Small Things That Everyone Else Can Deal With But I Can’t, vol.1

May 21, 2008

1. Everything’s A Question

You’re never going to guess what happened.  I was sitting in classssss?  And there was this giiiirrlll?  And she was all… saying something?  Like it was a quuessttion?  And then I remembered that everybody else does this, and so on this day – I decided to create this entry.  And I saw that it was Good.

I know this is a pretty common thing and that it’s often affiliated with stupidity, but I think there are some errors in that.  It just sounds dumb.  That’s why I never understood why people did it.  I hate it, and I hate you.  Use tones appropriate for what you’re saying, for the love of God.

2. Lyrics That Make Love Sound Unnaturally Torturous

“The last time I freaked out, I just kept looking down.  I st-st-stuttered when you asked me what I’m thinking about.  Felt like I couldn’t breathe, you asked what’s wrong with me” – Hannah Montana ‘See You Again’.

WHA-WHA-WHA-WALTA WHY DON’T YOU LAH-LAH-LAH-LIKE ME

I most likely cited those lyrics wrong, but that isn’t what’s important.  They are ridiculous and I can only be reminded of so many South Park episodes where Wendy says something to Kyle and Kyle, in his anxious inner chaos, harfs all over her face.  Miley is a puppy dog that pees all over the kitchen floor whenever someone rings the doorbell.  She also killed G G Allin and gave Magic Johnson AIDS.

3. Airline Food

“What the fuck, man?”

4. NOT BEING ABLE TO DO SOMETHING WHEN EVERYBODY ELSE CAN

SPORTS

END

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